"From what I myself can remember, I’ve always been a private person, both with regard to my thoughts and my body."

My sister often recounts a story which involves a two year old me escaping from the bath and running starkers around our estate. I would love if I had stayed that carefree. From what I myself can remember, I’ve always been a private person, both with regard to my thoughts and my body. When I was a kid, Saturday mornings used to be spent at my local swimming pool. The changing room was always full of people of different shapes and sizes, all apparently perfectly content to let it all hang out for the world (or at least a small portion of the town) to see. I, on the other hand, would sneak into the tiny bathroom and spend half an hour attempting to get changed without touching off the toilet seat. It’s strange to think that I was that private about my body even at such a young age, before societies norms had gotten the chance to wriggle into the back of my brain.

Nowadays, I’m trying to be more open. The more time you spend dwelling on it, the stranger it seems to be fazed by displaying your body, to anyone really. One person might have slightly pointier nipples or a perkier bum than the person standing beside them, but as a whole, we are all the same. During the shoot this was a notion that comforted me. Depending on the day, it can sometimes be one that scares the hell out of me. I suppose I like to think that on a basic level, we are the same. But it’s the little differences inside each individual that make life interesting.

I chose to write while Kate was taking the photos simply because it sends me to a nice place inside my head. Like I said, I am a private person. Sometimes I have thoughts, ideas, jokes, and I just don’t say them out loud. I can’t quite put my finger on why that is exactly- it’s almost like parting with the thought and making it public means losing something for me. I don’t know if this is an altogether bad aspect of my personality, but it is something about myself that I am trying to both improve upon, and to accept. When I’m writing, as clichéd as it sounds, I feel free. In my early days, I used to hold back, and write down what I believed sounded interesting, important or profound. These days, I just let it flow- good or bad. The moment I put a feeling, lyric, poem or story onto a page, I feel as though I’ve done something worthwhile.

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